THE BUDDHIST CARER

Normal caring plus Visitor for the weekend Equals very tired! Doing an amazing job Or so I'm told, that's nice. Still very tired though....

You think you know slow... An hour to eat his porridge That's a different slow.

Some flirty banter with my cheeky hairdresser Spotlights something deep. What he's looking for Is a bit of "connection." He seems a bit...

An all-consuming exhaustion. A big ol' dose of chronic sorrow. Is it a surprise that I have no oomph at all? Break ... before I break.

I'd have so much time If it was just me, not us But what would I do? Eat cake, drink coffee Do puzzles, wander round shops Sounds great,...

Finished the retreat By breaking into a dance Embodied release! Uninhibited In our little Zoom boxes Free to move and sway. Collective...

Embodied release? Just starting to get a grip On what that might mean. Letting myself go Into the retreat's rhythm Connecting, being....

Withdraw to a place of peace and quiet, they say. That is a retreat. So if I stay at home is it really a retreat? Well, no other choice!...

Who am I to say what makes life valuable, what gives life meaning? Ageing, illness, death will be encountered by all. So why don't we...

I could rush straight home Unpack the bags from the car Or I could just pause. Pause, eat cake and drink A little treat on the way Back...

Can't quite shake it off! I'm feeling agitated and I'm feeling tense. Someone made me feel so small, insignificant. Why did I let them? I...

Where are you off to? Upstairs, he says softly... but I help with showers! Well, I help with loads including walking upstairs to take a...

I'm doing nothing Consciously doing nothing And it's bloody hard! The urge to do things - Anything, maybe something - It feels like an...

Working far too much Risking burnout, exhaustion. The power of No! A fine balance Between being in-the-flow And plain overwhelm. And...

Visiting to help? Or visiting to impose, overwhelm, exhaust?

A real sense of flow When preparing to present Truly in the now. A real sense of flow I forgot about the caring. Truly in the now. A real...

An early phone call My heart is racing: who's this? Someone pretending. My internet's down? Erm, I don't think so, madam Ending this call...

I'd like to be green And recycle much much more. Caring ain't eco. Disposable pads Made of all kinds of plastics Landing in our bin. Bags...

Up late this morning Another snooze at lunchtime Clearly needs the rest. The tiredness of life - of living, ageing, dying - catches up...

Things in the diary. Good intentions to meet up don't always pan out. Better not to plan? To avoid disappointment? Or just hold lightly...